Our Two Cents- 11 Thoughts EVERY Woman Has Before a First Date

pic.jpgInstallment three, courtesy of Women’s Health Mag, outlines the 11 thoughts that every woman has on a first date. As first date aficionados, commenting on this post was almost a requirement. Enjoy the good, the bad, and the totally irrational!OurTwoSenseWomen’s Health mag

“Should I wear the sexy underwear?” If you wear it, it’s a little presumptuous. But if you don’t wear it, you might be totally unprepared. Is that third date rule still a thing? Ugh, better safe than sorry.

Since when is being over-prepared a bad thing? Always opt for the sexy underwear in my opinion, even if he doesn’t see it, knowing I look good makes me feel good, which equals the most important first date factor: C.O.N.F.I.D.E.N.C.E.

For me it’s more of a balance. I agree with Samantha, feeling good with what you wear can contribute a lot to confidence and success during the date. However, I like to make a careful selection between sexy and comfortable. I really don’t want to have to continuously un-wedgie myself throughout the night. I’m sure we can all collectively agree that’s not an attractive sight.

“I haven’t even shaved my legs yet, there is no way I’m going to be on time.” How did it get so late already? Oh, right, you spent 20 minutes on Google. That’s OK, everyone hates awkwardly standing outside of the bar fake-scrolling through their phone anyway. Still, if you don’t hustle it’ll be the difference between “casual late” and “rude late.”

If it’s winter there’s no way I’m shaving for a date. But if it’s summer and I’m wearing a dress or shorts, that’s a different story. Stubble with frills ain’t a cute match. 

Oh for me this struggle is far worse than the sexy underwear one…My constant debate is whether to just wear pants, not shave and risk that the pants MAY come off, or show up to the date with wet hair because I ended up jumping in the shower at the very last minute.

I’m a bit anal in terms of being on time, so if it’s in my control I will likely be on time no matter how much I want to be that girl who casually strolls in fashionably late. 

“Maybe I should cancel…” This is nerve-wracking. Now you have a headache and your makeup isn’t cooperating and you totally forgot your favorite instructor is teaching boot camp class tonight. How horrible would it be if you bailed? (Answer: pretty horrible)

From my personal experience and from seeing it happen to friends enough times, there are two options in this scenario. 1) The date goes incredibly well and you’re glad you forced yourself out 2) the date goes incredibly badly and you crawl into your bed never to leave the safety of your sanctuary again. You won’t know until you go on the date so ya, don’t bail last minute. That’s just shitty.

Ya, unless your reason for bailing is legit or comes from a place of concern for your safety and well being, it’s best not to bail. As you can see, Samantha and I have had our fair share of strange, fucked up dates. I don’t regret going on them though, because now I can share it with the rest of the world and we all get a bit of a laugh out of it. It’s an experience and often a necessary evil if you want to actually find someone decent.

“Should I hit the ATM?” Most men still try to pay for the first date, right? Clearly you’re going to do the wallet reach, and then it would be REALLY embarrassing if he took you up on it and there was zilch in there. But going to the bank would also make you even later…

K for real…it’s called plastic. This is not a 21st century problem babe…

Preach Sister Sam! LOL, enter Sister Sam, the world’s worst nun…

This thought has never occurred to me while getting ready for a date nor will it ever in the future unless the entire credit card infrastructure collapses and then maybe, just maybe, I’ll think about going to an ATM.

“Of COURSE there is rainforest-level humidity right now.” So glad you showered and did your hair, right? Real talk: You’ll probably look like a labradoodle by the time you get there, but at least then you’ll look even MORE beautiful on the second date.

Hah. As a female with extremely curly hair this is the biggest first date challenge of them all. I have this weird inner dialogue between the hair-down angel on my right shoulder and hair-up angel on my left. Righty constantly says that men like long hair, it’s sexy, and is more attractive (woo feminism…) while lefty is there to remind me that frizz is not sexy. It’s better to go with a ponytail and risk coming off looking austere than looking like a pompom.

Oddly enough, this thought does not really occur to me either (haters gonna hate, potatoes gonna potate). Contrary to Samantha, I have naturally straight hair and I can never be bothered to do anything with it. You’d be lucky if I even brush my hair before seeing you. -_- I’m a hater who’s hating and a potato who’s potatoeing

“I should probably prepare something witty to say.” You know, just in case there’s a lull in the conversation—you don’t want to nervously rattle on about your gynecologist appointment this morning.

No way could I do this. The second I try to map out how to say something, I fixate on it and inherently stumble over the words. Something clever about current events would probably come out sounding like a 4th grader reading the paper over her dad’s shoulder.

I definitely don’t prepare things to say. However, over the years, I have developed a few go to topics and tactics for when the conversation lulls. It’s useful to have as a backup plan, and can help the conversation along if the other person is lacking in things to say (which is often the case).

“Wait. What if he’s THE ONE?” This could be the first day of the rest of your life. You never know. Shhh, do you hear that? Are those wedding bells?

Well, I’m not going to lie. I have definitely thought about this more than a few times. I’m an over thinker and most likely even before I’ve met you, I’ve thought about all 3928109 scenarios that this date could result in. It’s probably not the healthiest approach but I’m not sure how to stop being like that.

Pro tip: Mitigate this issue by being cynical and not at all optimistic about any romantic encounter.

“Relax. It’s just one date.” OK stop, you’re psyching yourself out. Sure, he could be amazing, and you could be telling your kids about this someday. But he could also be horrible and chew with his mouth open. Or he could be a serial killer! Well, that escalated quickly.

This is the most accurate series of thoughts on the internet.

Pretty sure every single girl has considered this. Also, to have a backup plan is standard – like telling one friend where you are and if they don’t hear from you in a few hours, call the popo immediately. AHEM, excuse me, except for when this actually happened and it turned out you were on a 7 hour long date (Mr. Starry Night)

“Yep, you look amazing.” One last hair flip and smile in the mirror. Oh yeah, you would date you. You’re ready to go, girl. As a wise woman once said: YOLO.

Pretty sure a wise man once said YOLO but maybe the author of this post just wasn’t born in the 6ix. Nonetheless, I’m a huge proponent of self-love (IN A NON-SEXUAL WAY YOU PERVERTS) and it is crucial to rocking a first date like I know I can! *Hair flip*

Yup that saying definitely originated from our boy, Drake. Samantha, who you kidding, that nighttime self-loving is part of the picture too. At least we know if that date doesn’t work out, there’s also someone else you can rely on to have a good time: yourself.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Well, she ain’t wrong.



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