Mr. Family Man

Samantha – Lordy lord, the situations I get myself into…I don’t even know how I manage to fail so hard but lucky for y’all, I do. Please enjoy yet another amusing anecdote that is hopefully not indicative of my love life for the entirety of 2016.

I was in Mexico over the holidays with my family and our cousins from the States.  My cousin Jenna* suggested I check out j-swipe at our resort as Mexico is one of two breeding grounds for Jews over the holidays (the other being Florida).  I ended up matching with this really good looking guy who was totally my type and whose description said he was South African born and Toronto living. KK this is ideal.  A guy with the same background with me, cute and seemingly interested! We chatted it up and tried to make plans to hang out, which turned out to be a lot harder than you’d think it would be on vacay. But it’s cool, no biggie. I figured if we didn’t meet up in Mexico, we could always reconnect in the 6ix.

Anyway, I ended up telling Jenna about Mr. Family Man as she was the one who had initially motivated me to swipe it up in the first place. After describing him she asks: “Is his name Mr. Family Man?” Ya…why? I was slightly weirded out, but figured that there are only so many people swiping in the area so she must’ve come across him as well.

If only.

Turns out that she had in fact seen him on j-swipe but hadn’t matched because….drum roll please……Mr. Family Man is also my COUSIN.

Yes people, I was flirting with my cousin and I had no idea. How friggen hilarious is that?  Obviously the cute guy with a similar background to mine who’s actually interested is also a relative.


Ok, ok…this isn’t actually as absurd as it sounds. We’ve never met before and are related through our great-grandmothers, making him my 4th cousin or something, which isn’t even blood related! So this isn’t some sort of Karen smith/Seth Mosakowski situation, but is still WAY too weird to even consider continuing to talk to him in a non-familial way.


The best part: I was supposed to go for dinner with his fam while in Mexico, but he’d come down for vacay after a month away in China and was too jetlagged to do dinner. This situation could only be more ridiculous if we had discovered we’re cousins while having dinner with the rest of our family.

The big question remains: should I tell him?? Please weigh in loyal followers; I have yet to answer his last message but this is too funny not to share! Who knows, maybe he won’t be totally freaked out and will want to be friends. We could even wingman for the other, family always supports each other out right?

*name changed to protect my secret identity

5 thoughts on “Mr. Family Man

Leave a Reply to Simon Cancel reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s